Dana Brown

Blog Week: Alien

I’ve taken on a new life form - if you see me, you might not recognize me.  It’s actually working quite well and I couldn’t be happier but I don’t recommend it.  It’s called “balance”.  Even the word is boring and overused.  Truthfully, if I had titled this entry “Balance” would you have read it?

Only try balance if you have totally drained your tank.  It’s like medicine — it’s good only if you need it.  I’ve heard of people who quit taking their mood stabilizing drugs as soon as they feel better because they miss their “up” days. I so understand.  I’d much rather wake up in the middle of the night to draw or write and jump over piles of laundry to get to the studio.  Being passionate, consumed, totally focused — whatever you want to call it — it is the best way to live and create work.  Whatever it is we are doing, I see little good that can come from moderation. I see no reason for half-heartedness and full speed ahead is my pace of choice.  I loved working till 7pm and rushing to the studio at 7am!  There was no place I would rather be.

But I must admit, I let my tank run out of gas.  I kept thinking I could go one more mile….just one more….

So this balance thing, as alien as it is, went in to play.  Studio time went to the top of the priority list and burning the road up to art fairs went to the bottom. Cleaning the studio and caring for my studio cats went to the top and booking long range obligations slid down.  Basically TODAY is a high priority and commitments a year from now are low.  Along the same lines, gardening and doing our laundry slid up the scale a bit and late night sessions with QuickBooks went down. Learning a new medium went to the top and worrying about deadlines of ANY KIND went to the bottom.

A definite side benefit is that guilt went to the bottom of the list too.  Well, not totally but it’s somewhat in the normal range now.  So I begrudgingly admit that SOME balance has been an improvement.  But if you ask me, I’ll deny it.  So don’t bring it up.  I’m very serious about that - do NOT bring it up.  And here’s a peaceful picture I took on Monte Sano.  I can’t talk about balance without including a soothing photo.  I think that is in the blog bible somewhere.